東京 (Tokyo)

This weekend I joined 35 million of my favorite people to experience the craziness of Tokyo, specifically the ward known as Shibuya. Our first stop was a store called Don Quijote, which is sorta like a mixture between CVS and Spencers... Any good night out requires the perfect accessories, and we settled on some futuristic sunglasses. These sunglasses may have been our best purchase all weekend... *cliff hanger*.

One of my desires was to go to what's known as a Host Club. In what would have to be total awkwardness, women go to a bar where they are able to talk to a handsome young man they've designated as their "host". The host makes commission off the drinks he sells... clearly my alcoholism would serve once again to destroy my finances. First-timers get a special price and a chance to meet all the hosts. This video gives a good idea of what I'm talking about. Please note that they are speaking exclusively Japanese... *foreshadowing*

Most host clubs in Tokyo are located in the red light district called Kabukicho. Most people would consider the red light district of any city to be especially creepy and seedy... in Japan, it was Japan-dangerous. Japan dangerous means it was probably about as dangerous as Vegas during the day and twice as clean. Here's me and my friends rocking our glasses in Kabukicho.

As we wandered, I began to recognize a basic problem with my goal... our complete lack of basic conversational Japanese. Since none of the clubs were open to people who didn't know at least basic Japanese, our host club adventure ended before it ever began! My wallet was probably relieved... if it was capable of having feelings.

About our glasses...

JAPANESE PEOPLE LOVED THEM. Seriously. The girls were gushing over them, squealing "kawaii!" (cute!). The guys would stare amused while muttering one of these words under their breath (ordered in popularity):

1. X-men
2. Terminator
3. Cyclops
4. "We have a place you can dance on this planet!" **
5. Electric Girls

** Spoken by a Nigerian promoter

I was actually pretty surprised no one said "Star Trek", but maybe it just isn't popular in Japan.

We ended up going to another bar and met a Japanese pharmacist-who-did-not-practice-pharmacy who invited us to a party in a club called Vanity. Vanity was basically a trance/techno club that seemed pretty exclusive. Our Japanese friend, though, was insane. At one point he asked each of us, "Are you horny yet? When will you be horny?" Japanese Rico Suave at work.

After that, we went to bar that my friends frequent called Propaganda. While there, we told the owner it was my birthday (it's not) and we were rewarded with free drinks!

Our night complete, we promptly fell asleep and prepared for a second day exploring Shibuya. Our first stop was the famous Shibuya crossing, supposedly the busiest intersection in the world. 

 

There's me, walking across!

Also in this area is the famous Hachiko statue. If you haven't heard this story before, be prepared to cry... or at least 5 seconds of depression. Basically, the dog (named Hachiko) would wait every day at Shibuya station for his owner to return. When his owner died of a cerebral aneurysm and did not return to the station that day, Hachiko continue to wait every day at the station for nine years. Here's a photo of his statue with some random school children.

That day, we decided it might be hilarious to go to a Butler's Cafe (Click here). Basically it's a Host Club Light, but filled with European guys who speak English and treat you like a princess. After an arduous search (seriously, it probably took us 2 hours to figure out where it was), we found it! As we walked in, we were greeted by a guy dressed up in a butler outfit who asked if we had a reservation. We did not, but after seeing the tray of tiaras on the side (to complete our princess identity), we decided it might be just a little too awkward and left. 

On our wanderings, we did find another type of club -- a CAT CAFE! Yes, friends, there is a business that is a room filled with cats and you pay to hang out with them. Of course I did it. Despite the barrenness in this photo, it quickly filled up with people. Apparently they also have dog cafes and owl cafes. 

My cat fetish satisfied, we then headed on to a cafe called the Lion Cafe. This place was pretty awesome, and according to my friend, really creepy at night, not because it was particularly scary, but because it was set up (inadvertently) like a haunted house. Rows of pews faced a giant speaker which played classical music. Strict silence is enforced, and most of the people there were working on their computers or just sitting quietly listening to the music.

I snuck that photo in. And in the last random moment of the day, one of my old friends from medical school was in Tokyo with his girlfriend. I met up with them in Akihabara, the technology/anime part of Tokyo. There, we experienced the female version of the host club, known as a maid cafe. They aren't allowed to have their photo taken, but in this innocent street photo you can see a few. It's like Where's Waldo, only for finding dressed up girls. 

The maid cafe was as awkward as you might think (or maybe not... depending on your tastes). Basically you ordered food or drinks, and certain food or drinks came with 5 minutes of conversation with your maid. Oh, and apparently when we entered the cafe, the maids yell out, "The Masters are home!" Ha! I ordered a dish with eggs over rice, and the maid drew an anime-type photo of me in ketchup on top. We also had to do a spell to make the food taste better... it involved making a heart shape with our hands. Thankfully my friend's girlfriend speaks Japanese so we were able to enjoy our 5 minutes of conversation with her. It was quite unusual... I think my curiosity for these types of places has officially been quenched. A good overview video by the same girl with the Host Club is here and the idea of the spell is here (careful, a few curse words). 

An exciting weekend that left me exhausted!